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My Journey to Becoming a Kambo Practitioner

My healing journey started in 2004, after I had a full hysterectomy at the age of 28.  I was depressed, and mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, in a very stuck place.  I wasn't suicidal, but my numbness and victimitis were in full force in everything I did.  Then a miracle happened when I came across a friend I hadn't seen in a while.  She introduced me to Landmark Education, and my life was forever changed.  After that, I was a different person!  I saw the beauty in life, in others, and most importantly in myself.  But even with this massive shift, it was just the beginning of what I'd uncover next.

After doing Landmark, I was blissed out for six months.  My passion and love for writing came to the surface –– which I didn't know was there –– and personal growth and spirituality became my main priority and focus.  But, as they say, what-goes-up-must-come-down, and that's exactly what happened next, but more of a dangerous free-fall than a gradual come-back-down-to-earth.  From just one unforeseen moment of confused emotion, my entire mental utopia fell apart.  I found myself in an unfamiliar, very scary, dark place.  The fear that enveloped me was so overwhelming and so real that I became isolated and didn't know how to enjoy life.  In hindsight, I believe I experienced the dark night of the soul, and it lasted for over two and a half years.  But, during that time, I was still working on myself, because the only choice I had was either to suffer and eventually end my life––because I couldn't take the fear any longer–– or find a way to climb back up.  Obviously, I chose the latter.  And, although it was a slow and sometimes overwhelming process, I learned a lot about myself as a hard-core seeker, looking for a path that would put an end to my mental suffering.  My path included: Landmark course reviews, psychic readings, learning to read tarot, energy work, Kundalini Yoga, Reiki Practitioner Certification, 4 am morning Sadhana 3 hour rituals (my own version), Hay House Author Seminars, Sedona Spiritual Retreat, Brain Wave Therapy, "A Course in Miracles" and so many kinds of meditations.  I was on a mission! And, the cool thing was –– as soon as I finally started to feel stable within –– Transcendental Meditation (TM) came into my life, which was the beginning of everything.

I moved from Los Angeles to San Francisco to work for a non-profit organization that teaches TM to students, teachers, and administrators in the SFUSD school district.  I loved the job so much that 8 months later I went to the 6-month TM Teacher Training Course (TTC) in Fairfield, Iowa.  I thought, "This is it!" I'm finally going to reach my spiritual goals, get over all my fears, and get to that blissful place I've been seeking since I started this crazy path to "enlightenment" (I was a bit extreme, desperate to get back to living in bliss;).  Well, needless to say, it didn't go as planned.  Oh, yes, I did become a TM teacher, but the enlightenment piece was a long way off.  People warned me – since I haven't been meditating for a long time – that going to TTC would be like boarding a space rocket and launching to the moon. Because not only would I become a Siddha Meditator (TTC certification requirement), I would be absorbed 12 hours a day in Maharishi's knowledge.  Seriously, as I was going through the training, I kept thinking this might be one of the hardest things I'd ever do in my life – but that was before the course was over and before I understood what integration was about.

Yep, the third hardest thing in my life, next to not being able to have kids and the dark night of the soul, was the integration process from being away for 6 months in a TM bubble.  That was B-R-U-T-A-L!!!  It took me almost a year to start feeling like a normal human being again.  I was so flat, uninspired, angry, and just plain miserable.  I couldn't get along with my partner, my job was really hard, I struggled living in the Bay Area, and nothing was right.  But, the upside: where there’s pain, there’s learning, and boy did I realize how extreme I was being with personal growth.  I got that I needed to take a break and integrate everything I’ve learned and experienced since I started this work.  It was actually a relief, and in those three years of just meditating and teaching others to meditate, I became balanced and happy with who I was.  Now, I realize that when people get to a place of inner contentment, the world opens up to new possibilities, and that's exactly what happened next.

My growth path suddenly included writing, coaching, teaching, and facilitating emotional intelligence (EQ) life skills for high school kids, and it has become one of my greatest and most proud accomplishments to date.  I've successfully written and taught the first-ever high school EQ elective class for 3 years, got it A-G approved, which then extended to a week-long overnight summer camp where the kids learned TM and about themselves.  It was amazing!

So, one day, during the blossoming of my career in self-development, I got an email announcement about a kambo ceremony that was taking place in LA. It was like a lightning bolt of clarity–I knew I would be working with kambo and serving it to others.  It was so perfect, because I already had such fascination, experience and deep passion for healing and purging stored emotions through various techniques and plant medicines, such as Ayahuasca.  I scheduled my first session, and needless to say, the rest is history.

What I got from kambo wasn't exactly what I expected.  To be honest, I didn’t really know what to expect besides what I read online.  After all, I've been meditating for a long time, healing with different modalities and ancient plant medicines, and teaching EQ – an automatic path to growth, as I always strive to walk the talk to be an example for my students and clients. And that's NOT to say that I'm perfect by any means!  Leading by example to me is the willingness to be seen as a flawed human being and simply just use the tools I teach to overcome personal obstacles.

Anyway, after my first kambo session, I was in awe, totally amazed at what I had just experienced.  Not only did I feel clean and vibrant after such an unpleasant and somewhat painful session, but I felt more grounded and connected to myself than I ever had at any time in my life.  It’s surprising for me to even be able to say that because I’m generally a very grounded person ––but this was something else.  It really was a gift from a little green frog living in the Amazon jungle, and I wanted to know more about it.  So, I continued my path of self-discovery through Kambo, as my love and connection to it continued to grow, which then led me to become a kambo practitioner.  And now, there's nothing else I'd rather do in this lifetime than administer kambo to others to experience the magic and wholeness that it brings.  Viva Kambo!